Yesterday I told My Rebecca that, “I was beyond mistakes”.   I have been thinking about that since.  What the heck did I mean by that?  Was it just a casual remark or was it something substantial.

A friend just said that she was teetering on the verge of trying to do too much and making mistakes in the process.  I know that feeling, that place.  We all get there at times, juggling too many balls.

Then there is chemotherapy for me.  Running gallons of “who knows what” through my brain can’t be all that good for my memory, organizational skills and etc.  I have to interject that my beloved docs at the hospital know exactly what the “who knows what’s” are and are geniuses with my treatment.  That I know and trust.  It is I that am foggy on the topic.  See, foggy is a good word for my seeing.  I think that in some way it is a gift really.  I give up the detail for the ability to see better the bigger picture.  But, getting back to mistakes, now I am more apt to make mistakes in the details of things.

Yea, so?  Well, there is age that means that more mistakes of a certain kind are going to happen.  I am just not as sharp as in years past.  Right, true, but what about this statement that “I was beyond mistakes.”  I am seeing it as an attitude that yes, I make mistakes but so what?  They are in the minor category in the big scheme of things.  I don’t have the time or energy to dwell on them.  I have to keep walking, metaphysically speaking, and guess what?  Something is going to pop up soon to occupy me and I must get ready to do a good job with it.

So, I am looking on my own mistakes in a more loving manner.  I am being more patient with myself.  It won’t be the end of the world, this mistake, this glitch.  I will survive my own glitches in the end.  And I think this is spilling over to include everyone that I am coming in contact with.  I am more patient with others.  I will survive their glitches and they will survive mine.  We will survive our glitches together and maybe learn to thrive in the end.  Let’s work on that.

Time to go.  Love, Felipe.x.