Seems like since Daylight Savings moved my sense of time around I have an hour each morning to pray, meditate, wonder, get inside. My brain is waking up at. 0530 because the light is the same as 0630 a few days ago. Don’t have me explain that but let’s say sleeplessness has its benefits. And I finished the book “The Alchemist” in bed six hours before and I was still thoroughly saturated with that juice.

Now I have to back up to the Camino last year to tell you of the benefits that I came back with. It was a huge sack of plunder but the biggest prize is maybe the subtlest. The biggest prize is the knowledge that God is always next to me, so very very close. I didn’t need a lot of words to pray anymore as in the past. Before Camino God seemed to be always a distance away and a lot of words were needed to lure him in but not anymore. As I think of it we were so breathless and desperate at times that we didn’t have the luxury of all of those words, did we?

Another very important part of my situation was a workshop that I had the very good fortune to participate in recently. And this was a course taught by three lovely and capable women on what I would call Natural Horsemanship. It was all about communicating with their highly trained horses with one’s intentions. Yea. If we are without inner conflict and clear we can “talk” to a horse and get him to “dance” with us with our intentions. It was a very transformative experience is how I would put it and hard to put into words.

Well, what does that have too do with anything? It has to do with the idea that if God is close by and I just need a word or two to communicate what does it mean to communicate with God with no words, just my intentions. And if there are no words involved it must mean that God is very very close, yes? And this is where I have been lately working with this.

But let’s pull all this together if we can. This is all going to sound very “out there” and yes it is but follow along. So, also recently I have been trying to visualize and talk with my eleven tumors in my lungs. Can I convince them to start growing smaller, relinquishing their power. In that process I am trying to meet with the Soul of Cancer, that essence, that force that we dread. So, this morning with confidence and desperation I called a meeting with my Cancer, my God and Myself inside me. Yes, it happened!

Something has to give. We have to work things out. Cancer and I both have missions to complete. How is that going to work. Does one of us win and the other loose? Do we both become meaningful because we are locked in opposition? Do we both win? Do we continue to try and live together beating each other up? Hmm. And that is why God was there to start to sort this thing out. I don’t know anything beyond this at the moment but we got started and that is the news!

I am off to see Dr Zucker this AM. We will have some good stuff to talk about. So, keep tuned, more to come. Thanks, love you, Felipe the Pilgrim.