I forgot yesterday’s wise words.

Advent Calendar #22:

Bring back an experience from the past that was hard to bear but the presence of someone else made it better. Thank that person with a phone call or a message or plant a lavender as a sign of gratitude.
Cris CSABC

A kiss is a secret which takes the lips for the ear. Edmond Rostand

Oh, those are good ones! Felipé.

You guys exhausted me with all the birthday hoopla yesterday. No wonder birthdays only come once a year! It looks like a pretty day today but yesterday was all rain. I think that I changed wet clothes three times. But dried out now.

Jessika our Liason to Order of Malta got my name up on the marque at the Vashon Theater. Thank you dear. The last time I was up there it was Phil’s Camino showing with Apocalypse Now. Good pairing!

Yea, we had three walks and then the big Zoom party in the late afternoon. That was so fun. Must thank everyone there. And thank you all for the kind words and thoughts. It was only Pilgrim Farmer John who attempted a roast of Felipé. But it was pretty kindly, more like a sear. Thanks Annie for putting it together, you’re a peach! OK John, you’re are a peach too!

Another high point was Becky making it out to walk the trail. Remember she is the one I met at the hospital recently. Some of the time I put her to work sprucing up the bird feeders along the trail. And we had plenty of time to talk. Then she was able to get back to her place in Seattle and participate in the Zoomer. Also, her folks in Montana joined us for the long distance party. So, new folks coming in.

Well we got that out of the way and before we get all ready to roar into Christmas on the 25th we have Cris’s CSABC birthday on the 23rd. Let’s get some emails on her there cloistered away in Buenos Aires.

OK, keep it all going!

long distance loves, Felipé.

Advent Calendar #21:

Spend the day bringing to mind the people you have crossed in life for whom you are grateful for. Do it for as many as possible and while you have them in your mind, tell them, “Thank you.” Cris (So so Cris)

And how about this for a conjunction:

Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods. Aristotle

Well, I was ready to eat cake for breakfast today but couldn’t come up with any in the predawn but luckily Jessika had dropped off a box of
Walkers Mini Scottie Dog Shortbreads yesterday. None of them survived.

And remember to register for today’s Zoom Birthday Party which is at 5PM PT. The link for registration is in yesterday’s post.

Off to the 9AM walk.

birthday boy loves, Felipé.

Tomorrow, December 21st, is kind of a big deal around these parts. Phil’s something like 73rd birthday for one. And more importantly the 7th anniversary of Phil’s Camino the Trail. Yea, we opened in 2013 seven months before my Spanish Camino.

Annie, the dear has scheduled a Zoom Party at 5 PM Pacific Time tomorrow. Hopefully we will be able to cast this net far and wide and get a bunch of you. You have to register for this at Zoom beforehand. Here is the link for that:

Registration for Birthday Zoom!

Here we are deep into Advent. Deep into waiting on so many things this year. We pray that we hold it together day after day, month after month.

Advent Calendar #20:

Today bring back what you thought and reflected about on Day 18 (JOMO – the Joy Of Missing Out) and do it again or do something similar that makes your mind rest today for a longer time or in several moments of the day. Cris

Those who have a true friend can say they have two souls. Arturo Graf

waiting loves, Felipé.

From your Canadian Caminoheads Bureau Chief. William.

The follow from W H Murray 1913-1996 ( The Scottish Himalayan Expedition 1951 ) and Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe 1749-1832 is as applicable to todays world as it was back then.

Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.
Concerning all acts of initiative ( and creation ),there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way.

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.

Begin it now.

In my own personal experience these words rang true, especially when I consider how my Camino Journey unfolded after I had made the decision to go on this Pilgrimage.

I would like to complete this, my final blog of 2020, with the following words from Emily Matthews.

May you have-

Warm hugs to greet you,
Fun times to meet you,
Joy in whatever you do,
God’s LOVE to guide you,
Good friends beside you,
And happiness
All season through.

Advent Calendar #19:

Plan your day so that you can take a nap, or go to bed a half hour earlier, or stay in bed a half hour more. Cris

You can be certain about a friend in moments of uncertainty. Baltasar Gracian

I am hoping to be lucky with this amazing lotto ticket that Ronaldo bought us for Christmas. This lotto has been going in Spain since something like 1815. Well, I mean it is yearly but that has been going forever. Anyway, it is extremely popular with lots of folks participating all over the world and now Vashon Island too.

The Big Kahuna of prizes is known as “El Gordo”. Then there are numerous lesser prizes. And tickets are divided up in tenths and hundredths so prize money can be divided in tenths and hundredths. It all must get vastly complicated to keep straight.

So, we like it that Ron and Ann have included us in this new to us Spanish craziness. It is a whole new look for me into Spain and it’s people. Always more to learn!

Advent Calendar #18:

Practice JOMO: Joy Of Missing Out, embrace what is in front of you, trusting this is where you are supposed to be, feeling content with disconnecting as a form of self care. Cris

Life and Dreams are leaves of the same book, reading them in order is living, skimming through them is dreaming. Arthur Shopenhauer

feeling lucky loves, Felipé.

Advent Calendar # 15:

Today bring back what you thought and reflected about on day 11, and do it again or do something similar that makes you feel happy today. Today, it would be a double happiness day as you will also eat something that makes you happy! Cris

I am always astonishing myself. It is the only thing that makes life worth living. Oscar Wilde

Advent Calendar # 16:

Look at your day… where could you find a moment where your mind rested or where your mind could rest (if you are looking at your schedule)? How do you know your mind has rested or rests? Where do you feel your mind has rested in your body? Cris

Those who live of love live forever. Emile Verhaeren

Advent Calendar # 17:

Do everything slower, or just one thing at a time. Do not multitask for one day. Cris

The aim of love is to love: no more and no less. Oscar Wilde

Geez. Kind of a crazy day yesterday. And I was trying to write to you about it earlier this morning and the power was blinking and the Wifi was goofy. It was the tail end of wind and rain that hit yesterday while I was trying to navigate in the city, driving nightmare.

But the important business is the biopsy business. I wound up going in to Dr Gold’s although I got the word that the biopsy results did not come through. We decided to go with a blood test that would give us info and only take 10 days. It is the new improved blood test that was not available when we went with the biopsy a month ago. Things are changing quickly. So I ran in to give them the blood samples to get that started.

Results will be available on the 31st of the month. Getting a scan that day too so we will have beautiful brand new info. New results from the blood test and the scan for this our next meeting. But that is more waiting, geez.

But I did learn something interesting yesterday. And it may be important. The needle biopsy only probed a small portion of one of the tumors and there are many. But there was not enough living material to run the test. In other words in the area that they tried to test only maybe two percent of the mass had living cancer cells. I saw a pic of this. They were very sparsely scattered. Hmm. That may be important.

Anyway, the new test will go forward to learn if any mutation in the cancer’s DNA has occurred. That is an important thing to know to be able to choose the next treatment effort. Well, I think that I will quit there with this medical news, dreadfully boring stuff.

Thank you all for checking in on the Comments and with emails. I know that you are waiting with me through this. And this is important stuff too this connectivity that we have discovered, created and enjoyed. Thank you.

enjoyed loves, Felipé.

Here I am on the verge of something. I sense a “Y” in the trail coming up soon. We will learn more today with the glimpse that the biopsy. A month it has been, waiting, wondering, worrying… But underneath all this is the sense of gratitude for all the way that I have come and that we have come.

It has been years of work and tears and joy now since I got started on this cancer journey. It has been a crazy long time by any measure. It has been nine years since my diagnosis and seven years since my stage four categorization. Yea, I have been terminal for a long time. Almost like there should be another category just for Felipé.

And all of that joyful living during this time has been gravy really. Millions of dollars of drugs, doctor bill bills, hospital bills have gone by to be part of this. So much support has come from all of you, mountains of it during this time. It has been a crazy trip and long enough to do all kinds of adventures and writing that is all gravy.

So, right here, right now, I got a call from Dr Gold. Just right in the middle of this blog writing changing the whole picture for ten days anyway. Well, the news is that the biopsy was not successful and nothing was learned. But apparently there is also blood test that could give us the information that we are looking for and it’s turn around is ten days. So, I am still going in today to get more blood drawn to make this happen.

Well, well, so it goes. But the fact remains that it is all gravy after a certain point. I am thankful for all this no matter the ups and downs and craziness coming at me. And thank you to you for everything you do in all this.

you are a peach loves, Felipé.

Tomorrow is going to be all about my biopsy report so let’s get some last minute other stuff in before that. This is kind of timely and maybe important and above all juicy. Yup, juicy.

We have been talking about synchronicity for ages now and I’ve come to the conclusion after all this time that that is the way things are supposed to be. Coincidences are supposed to be. Camino Magic, the way things are supposed be all the time not just there. It is more a matter of focus than place.

Lately around here we have been talking about dreams. And not just dreams but dreams that involve each other. Or dreams that are prompts to do something for one another. Or dreams that are dreamt for another. This is happening here with us Caminoheads lately. Is it woo woo or is it the way things are supposed to be?

So here is the juicy part. A few days ago on the 11th, and I am just getting up enough courage to write about this, I had a dream just before waking in the morning. In the dream I came into the presence of a woman, actually one of my Camino girlfriends who will remain unnamed. Everything was very summery and light and airy. I moved closer to her expecting the most glorious juicy kiss imaginable. Everything looked perfect for it. And the very last moment she waved her hand in front of herself flagging me off and said one word, “Covid”. I was devastated with this bait and switch and woke up in an extremely bad mood. I fumbled my way through my chores and breakfast and finally sat down to attempt the blog post for the day. I open up the Advent calendar message for the day marked number 11 and it’s a quote from Sophocles. Check this out. “The desire to kiss you is draining, tiresome, it devours me.” Well just pick me up off the floor will ya?

As I look back on it the dream looks less exotic and more symbolic of our all our situations. Covid stands in the way everywhere between each of us and our desires. There is practically nothing that it hasn’t interrupted or destroyed in our relationships with each other.

true confessions loves, Felipé.