Something struck me this morning. A friend on FB whom I have never met but I know of wrote that he had “picked out his chemo read”. I put a comment on that mimicking the Most Interesting Man, “Stay productive my friends!”

Isn’t that an important part of life, to stay productive. Productive meaning doing something relevant, something meaningful with one’s talents. We need to fight the tendency to put our life on hold when touched by something like cancer. It is not the proper response.

We are needed through all this, we are not on holiday. It is important to remain engaged and interested in the happenings around us. This is practicing positivity. Being outside of one’s own problems is a sign of health I’m saying.

Yup, It was a chance little happening. Maybe I will met this fellow soon. We can compare notes on “chemo reads” and other positivity items.

Off I go. Make it happen out there. Yours, Felipé.

I realize that not everyone is as enthusiastic as we are about our Seattle football team but we had one barn burner of a game last evening! We were playing that much touted San Fransisco 49’ers who so far had been undefeated, as in they won every game this season. And guess what we beat them in overtime in the last few seconds.

Yea, Monday Night Football is one of the greatest inventions of Western Civilization in my book anyway. A couple of guys would agree with me. And we are the winningist team on MNF, that’s what they said. I don’t have a clue why that is or how that works but we’ll take it right?

And we had lost one or two games so far this year, I forget. A good record anyway. But they are hard to watch. They are extremely nimble in their style and they are at their best late in close games. They always seem to win or lose by a few points. But to watch them is to learn about pose and resilience and just downright failure to panic. It is hard to explain but it is definitely there. That is why we are so fun to watch even though we can give you a heart attack or at least ulcers.

This must be a reflection of the personalities of the coaching staff and of Pete Carroll, the head coach, in particular. My big claim to fame is that I wrote him in on the last Presidential ballot. Still think he is a good choice.

Because of this excitement we get a lot of exposure. Monday Night Football this week and Sunday Night Football next week. Yea, no joke. We make good watching.

But beyond all that for me personally Pete Carroll and the Seahawks are inspirational in a way that helps me in my life. To be nimble and creative are important characteristics to use in playing the cancer game. Keeping your opponent wondering and off balance is a workable strategy.

that’s what I see in it all loves, Felipé.

It’s Monday morning and I am staring at my blank blog post and wondering the path to take forward. I guess that is true there is always more than one path forward. Like that positivity is a choice at any given moment. Never quite looked at it that way.

Some times are like this, to start to write with nothing particular in mind. Just working with my native self so to speak. A muscle in my right thigh is twitching, is that a good topic? Janet, a friend and we usually meet on Monday but not today because she is on a trip to the Holy land, that has possibilities. I had another dream last night, that’s good maybe.

I am in a period of dreaming it seems which has always interested me. Always equated it with growth or newness. I haven’t had a dream period for a while but that is the way it always appears. It comes at a time when I can’t even remember
the last time, a long spell it always seems.

But the dream itself was a weird one. I had lent my vehicle to someone and I was there to pick it up. It was a red contraption like a backhoe. Whoever left it there had parked it in a ditch and it was so carefully suspended and supported by parts of it. It was a thing of beauty the way it was so cleverly balanced in it’s placement. The front bucket was holding it this way and one of the out riggers was holding it
another. The hoe had the backend stabilized.

It was a puzzle for me to untangle using all the practical physics that I could muster. It was kind of a challenge that a hotshot son would play on his old man. I was expected to get it out of this situation and drive away. Hmm.

Anyway have to walk in a minute. Big big Seahawks Football game tonight on Monday Night Football against the undefeated 49ers which we all love to hate. Yup.

parking puzzle loves, Felipé.

I never thought of it in those words or terms but Catherine put those words on it this morning. I said does that pay good? She said no. Hmm. But the idea that my visits to the Institute have turned 180 degrees for me is an interesting phenomenon.

To find the joy in the mess of it all is a treasure. I have a friend Joy who writes to me about finding the joy. That’s good, right? Somehow things reach a tipping point and something different appears. Hmm.

How does that work? It is magical realism maybe. A sort of positivity and humor that pervades everything if you look hard enough. But you have to know to look, that is key. Sounds so elegant.

Well, Marine Corps Birthday today. I think it is the 244th. Sort of a big deal in certain places and with certain people, the celebration that is.

Sunday walk in a few hours. Catherine and Dana are coming and you know they are always fun. Remember starts at 1530.

Yea, a rainy morning here on the Island. Most of us are hunkered down with a college football or basketball game on. The Farmers Market has moved to a more sheltered area, though they still have stuff to eat but toward the end of their season.

Yea, so we are here with the blog and I have redeem myself for all the shorty sunny weather posts that I’ve put out over the last few weeks. Now the serious blogging season starts. Now the good stuff should come out, hopefully.

Had a dream last night about three very tall men arriving at my house. Despite my original fear I did answer the door and went out among them. I had to have one of them sit down on the bench there as he was just too tall. Maybe this was a Father, Son and Holy Spirit trio?

They were moving me out of my house. And I was trying to clean up after myself and it was all very anxious with little time. I finally awoke and was relieved that it was “only” a dream and I could relax.

Seems as though I am going to die to something or move on to something else. OK, interesting. That is the way I am seeing it at the moment, Sort of heavy duty.

OK, what do I follow that with? Well, I am happy to report that I am finally seeing my visits to the Institute as a place for a salon. Just as the walks here have turned into a salon. Interesting people and ideas come and go and everyone prospers. That is an incredible turn as in time past it was hard for me to enter those doors. I would have to talk myself into it each time as chemo is such a chore. Now all of a sudden it is a joy to go in! Huh?

OK, so such is my life. Just reporting on the happenings as I try to navigate through this tangle. I am blessed beyond everything. Thanks for being here.

blessed loves, Felipé.

For the Blog:

In August of 2002, here in Ramona, a small housing development won the battle. An open field with three majestic Eucalyptus trees, one which had provided a home for a family of hawks for nearly a decade, all met their fate. To drive by that area now, one would never know of those tall sentinels which once stood there so proudly. In my desire to honor their spirit, I wrote this poem shortly after their presence no longer graced the horizon…

Remembering the Three

In a field near the road
Standing,
Through the years we could see
Their branches lifted skyward
Reaching,
Towards the heavens I believe

The hawks in the air
Enjoying,
And raising up their young
In the leaf cover of springtime
Shading,
Their little ones from the sun

But those days now are over
Providing,
Us their beauty in their scenes
These majestic three
Losing,
The battle of man armed with machines

Their great bodies ripped out
Lying,
Now piled pieces upon the ground
In their silence my heart
Aching,
In the wind there is no sound

Will man ever stop
Taking,
What nature so freely will share
And see the value in
Protecting,
Such things that are precious and rare

Soon new houses will be
“sprouting”
To cover land purchasing costs
And I with much sorrow
Knowing,
That what once was, is now lost

Rho Densmore
CSWBC

Debra’s recent blog post

There a nice Camino story from Debra Jarvis. I finally got to met with her Wednesday at the Institute after she is back from the her Camino. And it’s more than a nice story. It is evidence of the great value of lessons learned there.

I’m not sure how long Debra will be blogging at that particular site but you could look there for a while. She definitely has more to say as she unpacks from her trip. We will be working with her here maybe also.

Then on Wednesday I got a chance to spend some time with a woman named Damayonti. I hope that our opening conversation will lead to more in the future. So, maybe more to come on that also.

Here is a good one. There is a ukulele club at the Institute that meets Wednesday afternoons. How about that? That would be a fun thing to do while I am there. Man, I have to get practicing.

OK, time to get in the saddle and get my day going. Think about the walk and tapas on Sunday.

Camino lesson loves, Felipé.

Looking out the window to the south and all I see is yellow. The leaves have turned and are waiting for that one big blow to see them on their way. Today and tomorrow still dry and then Friday a little more chance of rain. Gratefully back from the city although yesterday had some great conversations. It’s nice that I can look forward to having a good time there, a place where most people don’t or can’t.

That has taken work though and perseverance. Changing something bad to good is possible most times I think. Is it perception or inspiration or the Holy Spirit or all three? Always the questions. Anyway possibilities open up in life even considering the sometimes nasty little details.

Walking in a minute. A good morning to feed the birds and say a rosary. Maybe Charlie will show up to serenade my sensibilities.

alperfect loves, Felipé.

Appointment day at the Institute today. Dr Gold gave me a big thumbs up with my numbers looking good. I am good to go for another three weeks. Three weeks an eternity these days.

And author and pilgrim Debra Jarvis checked in today after her walk across Spain. She was here for one day of our Veranda and then flew off and now is back. So I did a debriefing on her. She is having a bad case of reentry. And I had to reassure her that that was a good thing.

We know now that if you come back with no problems you really didn’t experience anything out of the ordinary, right? It just has to be a jolt to come back. How to deal with that is the question. She has been doing some writing on the topic. Maybe I can get a hold of some of that for us here.

Well, it is the evening now and I am falling asleep while I am trying to work on this. Have to go, more tomorrow.

almost Thursday loves, Felipé.

The other day I ran into a friend that I hadn’t seen in a while. He said that I looked good which I appreciate. And he asked about whether I was still doing OK meaning with my cancer hobby. And I said, “my cancer is so lazy” and then adding to that I continued with “or I don’t give it good ground to grow in”. He understood what I was getting at and wished me well and we parted shortly after.

Guy conversations are like that, short and sweet without the complications of details. I think most people appreciate a good short answer that is tailored for them. It’s understandable in their alley so to speak. My friend is a lineman for the power company, he doesn’t have time for the long answer when he is on duty. And we wouldn’t want to keep him from that either.

But sometimes I answer THE question with, “Oh God is keeping me alive for his own reasons.” which is a dandy short answer especially for a church audience. “I have good doctors and nurses.” which is indeed true could be a keeper. Or “God must think me humorous.” maybe. I don’t know there are hundreds of good short answers out there.

And yes, they are the short answers ultimately, useful but not complete. But really coming up with a good long answer seems maybe shrouded too deeply in the mists of life to be found with any sort of ease. It could take an hour to come up with something close and then it would only be a sort of loose knit approximation. And by that time your fellow conversationist may be asleep.

So, maybe it’s all good using the ever-changing short answer. It seems to do the job and keeps us all happy which is sort of the point most days. So breathe easy I am not going to accost you and tie you down to listen to something long and boring.

The way it appears loves, Felipé.