Look at that beautiful miniature lettuce growing in today’s pic. I think this all started a few tapas ago. Somehow we wound up suspending the butt end of a romaine heart that was being thrown away in some little bit of moisture. It was just an experiment and look what is happening, new growth, some new life. Major fun to see this in November when the whole outdoor world is shrinking and packing up it’s tent. And here it is right in front of me as I eat my meals. I know that it will not last long but neither will I. Just a little miracle produced out of the stuff we were throwing away.
A couple of days ago I way driving on the back roads of the the Island going to a job site and came around a corner close to a bluff overlooking the water. The afternoon precious sun was pouring in and the wind was blasting in over the bluff and the wind picked up a quality of the golden leaves that littering the ground and swirled them in a whirlwind. Like a dust devil but it was a leaf devil. What a sight! And it was crossing the road and I drive through it and it rocked my little pickup, this golden whirlwind which lasted a few dozen heartbeats.
I have been thinking about my tumors lately in sort of the best terms that I can come up with. What energy they have. What tenacity they have. The conditions that we put them in week after week, month after month means they are just hanging on to the cliff face with their finger nails, so to speak. Sometimes the scan shows no growth, sometimes small growth and one tumor got smaller and smaller and disappeared over time. Overall they are sort of amazing little guys if I can look at them objectively.
There is so much we don’t understand. There is so much to see and be rocked by. There is so much to wonder about. Energy seems to pop up out of no where and cause happenings that are miracles or catastrophes depending.
November love, Felipe.
Felipe, what a poetic description of the wild beauty of our earth! That wild beauty sometimes destroys what is dear to us, sometimes it just offers itself to our imagination, wonder and awe. There are some people in my life who say: “I hate cancer.” I never know how to respond. It is an expression of their anger over, their resistance to that which they suffer. Anything I say will either sound like a platitude or an admonishment. I can only hold them in my heart, where they are and pray for their healing. When I am with you, I always feel inspired by your attitude to observe, befriend and accept what is yours to carry. I pray often that the Father will let “this cup pass” from you. And that I may carry what is mine, when the time comes with Felipe like grace. Thank you for blogging, more poetry – anytime. thank you “tic-tac-toe” yesterday, a beautiful walk and warmly lit tapas.
Catherine ~ thank you for being a part of this, our situation. That sounds like it needs some cheering up doesn’t it? Thank you for being a part of our life together. That’s a little better. How about just thank you for now. I’ll work on this. Thanks, Felipe.x
Beautiful post, Felipe. As always. Gives us all something to chew on. Something to contemplate, which is one of my very favorite activities! We can never know what is in store for us, the whys and the wherefores. I had a Spiritual teacher in Vermont who would say “Why is never a helpful question.” You, my dear Phil, have consistently sidestepped the why for something deeper, something richer. We cannot know but we can move on to something, well, beyond knowing. Acceptance? Healing? Something that is bigger and better than knowing, that is for sure. We have all had things that we felt like we absolutely knew be turned to water in our hands, slipping through our grasp. So maybe knowing isn’t the be all and end all that we have been led to believe. Maybe it is the idea of constantly going deeper that is where it’s at. All I know is that I have seen it myself, felt it myself, and witnessed others having this same thought when they are around you: “I’ll have what he’s having.” Extra love to you today. <3
Annie ~ good to hear from you. I guess we do a pretty good job of continually skipping the “why” question. It saves a lot of time and energy for one thing. Taking life as it comes at us is how we approach things after learning from St James on the Camino. Seeing you soon as the magical mystery tour travels to California. Felipe.x